When redemption finds you
by lovetoreadeverything
Summary: Severus is given a second chance and an opportunity to live life untainted by his deepest regrets. However, he may not be too pleased with the manner in which the opportunity has been granted. Follow along as Hermione and Severus learn what it is to give and receive true love. Rated T for possible future content and occasional language.
1. Sacrifices

Authors Note: I don't own them I just play with them.

When Redemption Finds You

Prologue

She knelt by his side. Placing her hand over his shredded neck, her hand quickly became enveloped in his blood. She lowered her head, touching his forehead with her own. "Oh Professor, Oh Severus." She exhaled and shuddered. "I can't let you die. Not now." She whispered as she began to shake. Tremors vibrating through her body as she inhaled to speak again. "You may hate me if you survive Professor but I hope you will find happiness in your restored life." Hermione focused on controlling her breathing as she continued to lean over Severus. She reached out with her magic, searching for signs of life in him. She found the faintest of faint remnants of his own magic working tirelessly at keeping his heart beating. _There you are_, she thought as she focused on the feeling of his fading magic and sputtering heart. With a final deep breath, Hermione pooled her own magic in the pit of her stomach. Feeling her own essence gather what little strength she had left after the last 14 hours of non-stop battles. She reached for every bit of energy, soul, and magic she could, pulled it together until it was a burning sphere, seemingly ready to pull her apart if she didn't release it. Leaving her left hand on Severus's neck and placing her right over his heart, Hermione forced the burning sphere up from her stomach, through her chest, and felt it split and course down both of her arms causing a pain she could only equate to the Cruciatus Curse. She felt as if her very blood vessels caught fire and incinerated her from the inside out. She felt every vessel in her arms shatter like glass and then burn in waves until she passed out and felt no more.

Chapter 1 Sacrifices

"Ron, where is Hermione?" Asked Harry. They were leaving the Great Hall. It had been hours since the final battle ended. Harry and Ron had been mourning with the rest of the Weasley's. Their eyes burned with sleep deprivation and hours of tears. Hermione had run out of the Great Hall once the re-enforcement Aurors arrived.

"I'm not sure? The last I saw her she was talking to herself and heading for the whomping willow?" Ron scratched his head with both hands and brought his hands down to rub his face trying to gain some clarity and focus. Then he inhaled sharply and looked over at Harry with big sad eyes. "Snape… She went back for Snape, Harry!" He turned to bolt but Harry grabbed his arm. "Wait Ron, you should try to find McGonagall. Have her go with you. Hermione respects her and will listen to her. Hermione is bound to be terribly upset if she is out there with Snape."

Harry continued on to find a shower that worked. Most of the dorms had been demolished during the battle. A few students had told him the Hufflepuff prefect bathroom was still operational on the 3rd floor and that makeshift beds were being made in a few spare class rooms down the hall from the bath. Harry couldn't think. Wouldn't stop to dwell on the fact that it was all finally over. It was too soon. It still seemed surreal. Like the last 24 hours was a dream that he would soon wake up from. He had lost so many friends. So many people died for the cause… No, he couldn't think about anything right now. He just wanted to wash away the caked on blood, dirt, and grime that covered his entire body. He just wanted to take a shower. Just feel it all wash away.

Ron and Professor McGonagall found the whomping willow immobilized confirming their suspicions that Hermione had indeed went back to help Professor Snape. As they dropped down into the tunnel and began walking towards the shrieking shack. Professor McGonagall asked, "Mr. Weasley, What happen to Professor Snape? I know the Dark Lord killed him but Harry seemed to know how he was murdered. Where you three there?"

"Yes, Voldemort set Nagini on Snape. She attacked his neck pretty vicious like and he bled to death. Right in front of us." Ron got a faraway look in his eye and couldn't stop the tears that followed. It was all too overwhelming. Too many emotions to process.

A piercing guttural scream filled the tunnel and a wave of magical aftershock rippled down the hall and over their bodies. Ron and the Professor were pushed against the wall by the aftershock and their throats closed at the sound of what they knew must be Hermione screaming. The scream seemed to last forever. Ron instantly had a flashback to Malfoy Manor and the tortured screams he heard when he and Harry were locked in the cellar.

Suddenly they were released from the oppressive force that held them captive. They both took off running down the tunnel at full tilt. Ron reached the door first and threw it open. Hermione lay on top of Severus. Her upper body draped over his chest with her arms uncomfortably trapped between their bodies. An aura of power still pulsed around them. Cocooning them in a bubble of lavender and pink pulsing fog. The fog seemed to be seeping into the both of them. The cocoon was becoming smaller and smaller and as Ron and McGonagall stared at the sight before them. Neither Hermione nor Snape moved or made a sound. Ron stepped forward and McGonagall grabbed him by the arm and jerked him back.

"No Mr. Weasley, we cannot touch them. Not until the Vora-Eros is completely absorbed. Dear Merlin, what was Hermione thinking…" McGonagall stared in disbelief.

"What is it Professor? What is Vora-Eros?" Ron whimpered quietly.

"I haven't' the time to explain it just now. I need you to send a patronus to Madam Pomfrey. Tell her we need two strong Aurors to come to the Shrieking Shack and for her to prepare a king size bed immediately." McGonagall started casting silent charms towards Hermione and Snape so Ron stepped out of the room to send his patronus.

Minerva mentally shook herself.

When Ron re-entered the room the fog was gone and Hermione and Snape were wrapped in a sheet lying side by side but still touching. "Professor, what has happened? Is Hermione ok? Why have…" He stopped mid-sentence as he noticed Snape's chest rise and fall. Ron stared until it happened again and he gasped loudly and looked at McGonagall with wide eyes. "Professor, it can't be? I saw Snape take his final breath. The blood…"

"Shhh, quiet Mr. Weasley." McGonagall gently chastised and held up her hand to silence him. "Hermione performed an ancient Greek incantation. One only read about and theorized. It is said to invoke the powers of the God Eros, and bind a loved one to life if they are only a whisper from deaths door. It is very old magic and really only been examined in theory. The incantation is supposed to restore your loved one to full life but at great personal risk to the caster." McGonagall was kneeling down next to Severus's head and with her right hand tilted Hermione's head into Snape's shoulder. "They cannot be separated until one of them wakes. To do so, would possibly kill them both." McGonagall was staring at Hermione with a thoughtful concentration.

"Loved one? Professor, what are you talking about? This is Hermione and Snape! They hate each other; there is no loved one here? Ron exclaimed, looking bewildered and color rising to his ears.

"Things are not always as they seem Mr. Weasley. Do show some maturity and tact." Snapped McGonagall. "Hermione may have just given her life to save Severus's. Show some respect for her sacrifice, however misguided it may be. She used a spell of love that centers on family bonds. Not just in the sense of man and wife but also as in father and child. Whatever Hermione's feelings are towards Severus, they are based in some form of deep love. Otherwise she would not have been able to cast the spell successfully."

Ron continued to stare at Hermione and Snape in confusion.


	2. Mollycoddling

Chapter 2 Mollycoddling

Severus stirred into consciousness. The first thing he realized was he felt comfortably warm, not hot. _Perhaps the reigning deity took pity upon me and I am not burning in hell or maybe I'm stuck in purgatory,_ he thought. His next conscious thought was of his sandpaper coated throat. He opened his mouth and rasped a cough. With his next intake of breath he recognized the taste of the air. He was in the hospital wing at Hogwarts. And with this thought he opened his eyes. They burned and he instantly squeeze them shut. Then he felt a hand on his chest.

"Lie still Severus you have been through quite an ordeal. Let me put some drops in your eyes before you try to open them again." Madam Pomfrey said as she scuttled around the bed.

_How the hell am I still alive_ thought Severus._ Death had called and I willingly answered. I was sitting at a muggle bus stop awaiting the bus to my final destination. I saw the bright headlights and then BAM, I am waking up to Madam Pomfrey's incessant mollycoddling_.

Suddenly Severus felt a slight movement along his right side. Then he became aware that his entire right side of his body was up against something warm. He stiffened by reflex and moaned lightly in pain. The involuntary flexing of his muscle had awoken every nerve ending in his body and apparently they screamed in protest.

"Tut tut my boy. Try not to move too quickly. I imagine you are sore, yes?" asked Madam Pomfrey as she set a vial of pepper up and pain potion on his bed side table and fussed with his pillow. Simultaneously the warmth on his right side disappeared and Severus heard what sounded like a nearby curtain being drawn.

Severus growled and opened his eyes. It took a few moments for his world to swim into focus. He moved tentatively toward the potion vials. His delicate nose recognized the contents immediately and he downed them both.

Returning his head to the pillow Severus turned to the motherly witch that was now fussing with fixing the bed linens. "What happened Poppy? Is it over?"

"Yes my dear boy, it is all done and you, you blessed man are a hero." Severus made a strangled sound. "Now don't pull that face with me Severus Tobias Snape. I have known you since you were a boy and toiled over you bed side through peace and war seeing firsthand the sacrifices you made and kept your secrets all these years. Your sneers and pretense are wasted. I am the closest to a confidante still standing Severus Snape so let's forgo the posturing insinuating otherwise shall we?" Poppy sat herself down by his side on the left side of his person and looked at him kindly.

"I am so proud of you Severus, there that will be the last of my _incessant mollycoddling _as you would so pointedly put it." Smiling she vanished the empty vials and looked back at the now grimacing Severus. The left corner of his mouth slightly turned up, giving away his true amusement at Poppy's statement. Then the slight smile disappeared and he looked into Poppy's strained eyes.

"Tell me, Poppy, what happened?" Severus felt both hopeful and trepidation at the dawning of this new day. No, he had not anticipated living thru the second war but since he had, there was a whole new set of concerns to ponder. What is his status with the Ministry? Would he face persecution and possibly Azkaban for his part in the war? He could never explain Albus. A tear threatened to break over the rim of his eye. He bowed his head to allow his curtain of black hair to hide his face.

"Well, I don't know everything Severus but I will endeavor to bring you up to speed. We have some time before McGonagall makes her rounds." With a smirk of her own, Poppy continued on. "I know how you love speaking with Minerva." They both snorted at her jibe. "Let's see, first things first. The Dark Lord was indeed slain by Harry Potter. Shacklebolt is acting Minister until a proper election can be arranged. Public opinion seems to have him pinned as just the ticket." Severus snorted but bobbed his head in approval. As she continued on, he wiggled his toes and tested his faculties. All seemed to be in order. The potions had taken effect and he was feeling marginally less sore. In curiosity he brought his hand to his neck. The surface seemed fairly smooth save a jagged scar at the base of his neck that trailed along his collarbone. Poppy's next remark caught his attention and brought him out of his self-inspection.

"We lost many in the final battle. Only a few of the elder Order Members remain. Myself, McGonagall, Shacklebolt, Molly, Arthur, Bill Weasley and his wife." Poppy wiped a silent tear from her eye. After taking a deep breath she continued. "McGonagall is acting Headmistress and the board of directors has asked her to stay on at least for the upcoming year. She is really having a tough run of things at the moment. It has been three weeks and she is still dealing with the press on a daily basis, providing supporting memory reviews and making sworn statements for the ministry to help aid in trials and doing all she can to put Hogwarts back together so a school term will be possible by September."

Severus took a shuddering breath. There were so few of his colleagues left. A thought came to him. "What of Remus and Tonks, Poppy? Surely not both?"

Poppy looked up at him with a crease in her brow and a fresh tear rolling down her cheek.

Severus recoiled slightly, and exhaled. Almost in a whisper he asked; "What of their fur ball?" Poppy smiled softly "Molly has Teddy for now. Remus and Tonks had the foresight to make provisions in the event…" Poppy trailed off not wishing to articulate the words that would surely have her blubbering again. She was quite tired of crying.

Severus moved on, not wanting to distress the women to the point of not being able to continue learning of what had transpired during his absence. _Did she say three weeks? _

"Poppy, how long have I been incapacitated?" Severus sat up a little straighter now. His aches were about gone and his mind seemed to be clearing now. _How had he come to survive Nagini's attack? _

Poppy smiled as she watched him come into his self. Severus was always quick to come around once he woke up. His mental self-control always impressed her. "You have been out of commission for 24 days my boy. You are likely starving for solid food."

As if on cue Severus's stomach groaned and the nagging gnawing feeling of hunger made themselves known. "Indeed, I seem to be famished to the point of distraction." Severus stated partly amused.

Poppy was already making her way back to him with a tray of food. She pulled out the side table and swung it in front of him. Severus tucked his bed covers out of the way and focused on the tray of bread and vegetable soup. Sneering he said "I thought you said solid food. What is this prison ration?" His words rang through his mind and his eyes grew wide with distress and looked around the hospital wing.

Poppy saw his reaction to his own comment and knew what startled Severus into a new level of awareness and spoke quickly to reassure him. "It's alright Severus. There are no Aurors or Ministry officials here. You are not in danger of being tossed into Azkaban. Your efforts and intentions are known and supported by enough people to keep the Ministry from taking unwarranted actions against you. The Aurors did attempt to remove you from my care at first but Minerva quickly set them straight and began the process of vindicating you from all charges thrown your way. Every Order Member provided memory testimony a few weeks ago. Albus's portrait finally woke last week, and provided his account of his death. The ministry will still want to review your memories and question you but I don't think you will be going to Azkaban Severus. Even public opinion of you is supportive. That has to do with Mr. Potter and his friends but that I will leave for another time." She smiled impishly and looked back at Severus. His posture had relaxed again and he was nibbling at his rye bread. His trademark sneer was making an appearance as Poppy knew it would. If there was one thing Severus disliked was attention. Oh, when he finds that his shared memories were now public knowledge he would surely be unmanageable. Poppy thought that little detail could be left for someone else to divulge. So it was Minerva McGonagall that would have the honor of revealing all the unsavory details to Severus.

As Severus ate, Poppy moved on to tend her other patient and mind her duties elsewhere. Deciding he would ask about Madam Pomfrey's comment regarding the public opinion of him later he decided to continue his self-evaluation until Minerva came calling or him.


	3. Bitter Sweet Success

Authors Note: I don't own them I just play with them.

Chapter 3 Bitter Sweet Success

It was late afternoon when the light started filtering thru Hermione's heavy eyelids. The burning of light across her iris sparked movement in her brain and her eyes opened and the world swam in focus. The world tilted and spun. She squeezed her eyes closed. For a precious moment there were no thoughts. Only disoriented silence. Then her senses returned and she sat slightly forward in the bed and gasped in shock. Questions reeled across her mind as she pressed her palms to her temples in attempt to stop the swirling sensation that dominating her senses.

_Where am I? How did I get here? Last I recall I was in the Great Hall. No, wait I was with Professor Snape. Snape! _Her eyes shot open and the hospital wing at Hogwarts came into focus. She tried to look for Snape in one of the other beds. As she moved her head the room began to sway and she felt as if her body swayed with it. She heard footsteps coming closer as her vision darkened and her head hit the pillow.

Madam Pomfrey walked back into the hospital wing just in time to see Hermione pressing both of her hands to her temples as if to keep her head from extricating itself from her body. She hurried forward but Hermione had passed out before she could make it to her bed side. With a quick wave of her wand over the now prone girl the patients' vitals appeared in the air. All seemed well. Her heart rate was a little high but quickly coming down. Madam Pomfrey then whispered another incantation and Hermione's body pulsed with a lavender aura. The lavender was solid in substance, not transparent or churning, her soul seemed fine. Her aura did have grey edges but Madam Pomfrey come to recognize this as normal for Hermione now. _War darkens all of our souls a bit_ she thought to herself as she watched Hermione's aura dissipate from view. _Poor dear must have been overwhelmed upon awakening. _Madam Pomfrey thought and she cast a rejuvenation spell to help Hermione come around.

Hermione took a deep breath and felt life and energy move thru her body. Rejuvenation spells make you feel fresh and new as if you woke from a peaceful nap to find yourself bathing in a refreshing spring. As Hermione opened her eyes Madam Pomfrey smiled down at her.

"Alright now, how do you feel Ms. Granger?" Madam Pomfrey bustled around her bedside, levitating a glass of water to Hermione as she came to her senses. Hermione sipped the cool liquid and sat the glass on the side table.

Hermione sat herself up gently and flinched at the wave of pain that shot thru her. Her head began to throb. As she pressed a palm to her pounding temple Madam Pomfrey slid a vial into her free hand.

"Yes, magic depletion leaves you with a nasty headache, a bit like a hangover feeling actually. Drink that and then follow with these other two vials here." Madam Pomfrey gestured towards to side table and two vials appeared.

Hermione drank them as instructed and closed her eyes, resting her head back on the pillows. Trying to organize the compounding questions in order by relevance. Hermione asked "Madam Pomfrey, is Professor Snape… here?" She wasn't sure if she was ready to articulate her worst fears just yet.

"Oh yes, Professor Snape is just fine I would say. Actually, better than fine I would wager. I think you patched him up quite well." Poppy gave her a knowing look and a slightly raised brow. Poppy's smile reflected a curious excitement in its corners.

Hermione blushed. "So then, it worked? He, he survived?" She started looking around nervously. "Are we alone in here?"

Madam Pomfrey cast a Muffliato Charm and turned back to Hermione.

"There my dear, now we may speak freely. There is no one else in the wing but one can never be too careful." Madam Pomfrey sat down on the corner of Hermione's bed.

"Oh Madam Pomfrey! I can't believe I succeeded! I saved all three of them!" Tears began to swell in Hermione's eyes and she sank back into her pillow a bit. "I was afraid I had been too late to save Professor Snape." Hermione trembled with the emotion overload of what she had felt when she opened the door to the Shrieking Shack. "He was barely alive when I finally made my way back to him." Hermione looked at Poppy now, searching for a sign of the woman's opinion of what she had done. She knew that if she woke up in the hospital wing then Snape must have too. Which means Poppy may be aware of what she had done. Poppy had been a supportive confidante after Dumbledore died and had kept Hermione's secret for the last few years.

"My dear Hermione. I am in awe at the sheer audacity of your method of saving Professor Snape but if there is anyone who deserves your sacrifice, it is him I think. How did you even come up with such an idea? Really, what arcane piece of literature did you find that told you of the Vora-Eros incantation?" Poppy smiled widely as she leaned against the rail of the bed, making herself a bit more comfortable. She had weeks to think over what Hermione had actually done that day. Poppy had a few intuitive thoughts and opinions. _All in good time_ she thought. _Let the girl figure it out on her own. Best not to meddle in these matters_.

"You never cease to amaze me Ms. Granger. You truly are an amazing witch you know." Poppy had been well aware of Hermione's efforts and what drove them but she never questioned the girl on her methods along the way. The attempt, let alone use of a Vora-Eros incantation though, well that was just so unexpected! Yet so fantastical one cannot help but to be curious about it?

Hermione smiled. "I actually learned of the incantation from an old tome I stole from the Lestrange vault. I wasn't sure it would actually work? We are not family. The author's notes expounded on the ideas behind the necessity of being family but it was all based on intent..." Chattering on, Hermione did not notice Poppy's small curling smile rounding her cheek for a few moments.

Poppy thought back on where it all began. It had been during Hermione's sixth year when the girl woke dazed but determined in the hospital wing after Harry had found her in the library unconscious. Hermione was hysterical when she woke up. Speaking of possibilities and defeating the Dark Lord. She rambled on about Possibility Theory, possibility and necessity showing her possible truths of the future and how she had to speak with Dumbledore. It had taken Poppy a good hour to calm the girl to a point of being able to make sense of what she was saying. That is when Poppy really started listening to Hermione's tale.

Hermione had crept into the restricted section of the library to find a book to help her better understand the use of Possibility Theory vs Probability Theory in relation to field of Divinations. As she browsed a section with related material she found a book called "Divinations, just blithering nonsense or a manifestation of Possibility Theory".

"I despise Divinations Madam Pomfrey. I think it is all a bunch of malarkey. So when I saw the title I just knew I had to read it! " A flustered sixth year Hermione worried her lip and rambled on with her story. "When I opened the book I became entranced and was unable to put the book down or look away. At first I was scared that I was dealing with another Horcrux in a book situation! Then images began to reel across the page like a movie. I saw different scenarios of events."

"The book splayed the word _**"If"**_ and depicted series of events. First I saw Draco standing on the astronomy tower disarming Professor Dumbledore. Then a woman's voice tells him to cast the killing curse. The image fades to Professor Dumbledore falling from the Astronomy tower! The pages began to turn and the word _**"Then" **_appears and fades away as more images stream across the page. Voldemort is in the shrieking shack and he is circling Draco. Voldemort is saying something about a wand not obeying him and then he murders Draco! The picture changes and Draco's mum is shown on a ship, grieving as she retreats to France. The pages turn again to show Harry, Hagrid, Voldemort, and several Death Eaters in a forest. Harry was lying on the ground. Bellatrix Lestrange was standing over him, cursing him!"

The book presented two more possible chains of events. Hermione explained how it was like viewing a memory in a pensieve and how the scenarios were clearly different possibilities of the same situation being manipulated to reach different conclusions.

Hermione coughed and brought Madam Pomfrey back to the present. "Madam Pomfrey, I know you don't understand, it surely makes no sense but I felt I owed him so much after… everything he has been thru and I have always respected Professor Snape. He didn't want to do the horrible things he had to do Madam Pomfrey." She straightened a bit and gasped "I need to speak to the Ministry! Professor Snape did not murder Professor Dumbledore! Professor Dumbledore was dying. He asked Professor Snape to have mercy upon him and to spare Draco Malfoy by killing him himself!" She breathlessly tumbled on as her scrambled thoughts came spilling out. "Has Professor Dumbledore's portrait come to life yet? What day is it? Where are Harry and Ron?"

Madam Pomfrey's expression softened and she smiled gently with an air of lightness. "Take a breath Hermione. First, call me Poppy. You are no longer a student and the title seems silly at this point."

Hermione smiled up at her. "Thank you, Poppy." It sounded so foreign in her mouth. It would take some time getting used to. Poppy inclined her head in acknowledgment and continued speaking.

"The Ministry is aware of the details surrounding Professor Snape's actions. We all now know just what a truly gallant man he is. I dare say he will not be pleased about that." Madam Pomfrey smiled a humorous smile and shifted at the foot of Hermione's bed. "It is May 26th. " Hermione sucked in a breath in surprise. "Harry and Ron are at the Burrow. When you are feeling up to visitors, you may owl them."

Hermione visibly relaxed. _Oh, thank Merlin_. She thought and smiled. "I will send for them tomorrow I think." She was still tired and more than a little nervous about Professor Snape's pending reaction of the situation.

Madam Pomfrey sighed. "Hermione, you do not have to explain anything to me but I am curious about the spell you used. Minerva explained a little to me. She said it was soul magic and that you sacrificed part of your own soul to save Severus's life. I have cared for Severus his whole life. He is like a son to me really." Madam Pomfrey leaned forward slightly and look into Hermione's eyes. "He was different somehow earlier today. I couldn't put my finger on what has changed, but something is definitely different. Do you know if there were any adverse effects of the spell?"

Hermione bowed her head and her cheeks flushed a light pink. She knew this line of questioning would come and she was practically trembling on the inside as she spoke. "He is going to kill me Madam Pomfrey, errr Poppy. I am truly a dead women walking, I have no doubt." She spoke so softly Poppy had lent in as she spoke to hear her better.

Poppy chuckled softly. "Hermione, I know Severus is a prickly man but you did save his life. That will count for something. Knowing him as I do, his initial reaction will likely be of fire and venom but he will come around. His bark is generally worse than his bite." She smiled at the young women at the other end of the bed. _She has grown so much in the last year_ Poppy thought to herself. _Quite lovely too. _"Tell me what you can dear." Poppy urged her on.


	4. Unimaginable Feats

AN: Thank you for your comments and keep them coming. I am interested to know how you like this chapter. I am not completely happy with it but it is also only a part of the scene.

Chapter 4 Unimaginable Feats

Severus and Minerva held council in the staff break room. For this, Severus was very thankful. He did not wish to lay eyes on the Headmaster, or Headmistress' office just yet. His time occupying that office had been nothing short of hellish. He also had no desire to take a trip down memory lane with Albus. Severus was still peeved at Albus for lying to him about Potter being a Horcrux. Severus may have had little love for Harry but as the only living thing left of Lilly, he had felt beholden to him. Reflecting on his past feelings Severus felt oddly indifferent towards the thought of Lily at the present moment. _How very strange. I don't feel that familiar oppressive weight when I think of her now_. _Perhaps it is due to Voldemort's fall. My debt repaid in a_ _sense._ Minerva's nasally request for attention brought Severus out of his musing.

"So, with Albus' portrait's testimony and the remaining Order members statements provided verbally as well as through memories you have been vindicated. The Aurors office still wishes to speak with you but you should not worry about your freedom." Minerva had been dreading this moment. Severus would need to be told what had transpired. _He is not_ _going to take this well, _she mused and wrung her hands nervously. This situation was particularly painful for her as she felt deeply sorrowful for how she and the rest of the Order of the Phoenix had turned their back on Severus the moment Albus drew his last breath. In retrospect his time as Headmaster must have been one of his darkest hours and the Order had failed their comrade. On the other hand who could have guessed Severus' truest motivations. A woman,

Harry's mother no less. Who would have ever guessed such a calculating and unyielding persona had laid its foundations in the heart and then fortified its porous soul with concrete to protect itself and survive a hellish destiny? It was unbelievable. Yet, thru it all he survived and now stood before her. To have survived one life of servitude and responsibility to face yet another constriction seemed beyond unfair. It could be assumed that being the recipient and motivation behind; what he would undoubtedly see as the corruption of something innocent, seemed cruel for him to have to endure. _How she wished Hermione had awaken first. She only knew a vague description of the spell and Merlin help her she had no real answers for Severus as to why or how Miss Granger had_ succeeded but she is a remarkable witch. Severus' medical reports is where Minerva really saw just what the Vora-Eros had done for Severus. It was nothing short of astounding. Minerva's thoughts were churning. How could she present these details to Severus with the least traumatic effect?

Minerva stood at the tea counter. The six-foot piece of granite countertop with Elvin beveled edging defined a large recessed area in the castle wall with provisions for making tea, cocoa, and coffee. Skillfully carved black metal shelves of lace design lined the walls, outlining the alcove. Tea and coffee cups of all sorts filled the shelves. It was an interesting menagerie. A thought came to Minerva _Severus does enjoy licorice tea_. "Would you like a cup of licorice tea Severus?" Minerva offered.

Severus pursed his lips and reclined in his high back chair. Templing his fingers and touching them to his lips he contemplated. _Poppy_ _avoided the subject artfully and now Minerva is stalling. The public persona manifestation, or infestation more like, and the means of my_ _survival must be of such caliber they know it will raise my ire_. He was no fool. Poppy had already made it quite clear that his memories had been made public. _It figures Saint Potter would be thoughtless and_ _dispassionate enough to blab my most carefully guarded secrets_. Bile pushed against his throat. His stomach churned. "Yes, thank you." Severus oh so slightly curled the corner of his lip." I have heard all of this from Poppy. Tell me what it is you so obviously are trying to delay."

Minerva, looking at Severus, slightly tilted her nose up and gave a light sniff of indignation. She would swear he could sense chicanery from a mile away. Yes, Severus was ever the Slytherin. She exhaled heavily. she considered her words as she prepared tea for them both. "In attempt to help clear your name Mr. Potter provided the Ministry the memories imparted to him. While under the care of the Auror Department the memories were leaked to the public."

"Yes, well. Poppy has alluded to the public's knowledge of…" Severus was not sure how to address his feelings regarding the publicizing of his memories. Articulating each word he continued. "The truth." He looked Minerva in the eye with this statement.

She was tongue-tied. What could she say? In two words he leveled anyone's argument or defense against all he had done.

He smirked inwardly. He had duped them all.

_Straight to it then_, thought Minerva. "Miss Granger returned to the Shrieking Shack after the battle. I understand that Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, and Miss Granger was present when you were attacked? They were hiding. Do you recall you interaction with them?" Asked Minerva.

Severus grimaced. He did not like where this conversation was heading. "Yes, the miscreants came out of hiding after the Dark Lord left and I gave Mr. Potter the memories he needed to understand that he was an accidental Horcrux." _Now the whole begotten wizarding_ _world thinks me some sort of dark hero with a big fuzzy heart._ Severus curled his lip. Breathing out heavily through his nose he watched Minerva make her way to their seating arrangement.

The staff break room held the shape of a clover. The first petal to the right hosted several small but ornate work desks all facing each other in a circle. This area provided teachers a workspace that facilitated group conversation. The walls were lined with intermittent bookshelves and black boards. The second and center room was of a more casual nature with a kitchenette in the center and cozy tea tables, nestled against large windows encompassing the room that provided breathtaking views of the grounds. The third room, where Severus and

Minerva were convening resembled a house common room. A large stone fireplace flanked by tall windows on either side made the main focal point of the room. There were tapestries representing different houses and paintings of earlier professors dotting the walls. A tea alcove was on one side of the room and a reading nook on the other. In the center of the room were several plush chairs and side tables for comfortable conversation.

Minerva handed Severus his cup of tea and took a seat across from him. "It was reported by Mr. Potter and Mr. Weasley that Miss Granger had been beside herself when they made her leave you in the Shrieking Shack. After the battle was won Miss Granger returned to you. Roughly four hours later Mr. Weasley came to me in a state of duress requesting I help him in finding Miss Granger. He believed her to have returned to the Shrieking Shack and to be extremely upset about witnessing your death. As we made our way down the tunnel under the Whomping Willow I believe Miss Granger cast a very ancient incantation." Minerva paused to take a sip of her tea.

Severus took a moment to ponder this new bit of information. _Why in __Merlin's name would Miss Granger give two cents about my person? __As far as she knew I was just another Death Eater? Perhaps after she viewed the memories with Mr. Potter she felt some sort of remorse. __She will likely expect some sort of accommodation for her efforts no doubt. _He sipped his own tea and smirked into his cup_. Like hell, I will not give her the satisfaction. _Severus was mentally growling at the thought of owing his life to the little know it all. She had been a significant part of keeping Harry safe over the last several months. No correction, since he was eleven. Still, she was an especially annoying personality.

Minerva cleared her throat and continued on. "The child darn near depleted her core in her efforts. Quite amazing actually! She managed to heal every wound on your person including the tears to your vocal cords and esophagus. When Mr. Weasley and I entered the room she had lost consciousness." _Now for the nitty gritty_, Minerva sighed inwardly.

"Yes, well done Miss Granger. Rah rah rah." Severus flippantly tossed his hand about in sarcasm. "She obviously exceeded her magical limits in her attempt to carry out the impossible." Severus ever so slightly crinkled his nose in disdain at the last word. "Tell me Minerva, what spells did your little protégé cast?"

Minerva steeled herself against the wraith she knew was coming. She looked over at Severus. "Severus, would you cast an Animus Charm?"

Severus lowered his chin to his chest and furrowed his brow in confusion. "Whatever for?" The Animus Charm reveals your souls aura. It allows you to look at the condition of your soul. Severus' soul had its share of damage. He was curious once when he was a younger man as to just what condition his soul was in. He had already done so many deplorable things, he was curious to what extent his soul had suffered. At the time he had a deep gray fringe with a pale green base color. Grey indicated an abused soul. Base colors are unique to each person. There are seven main colors that can vary in shade. Blue and Green, the most common; Yellow, Red, Orange, Lavender and the extremely rare, White.

"Humor me Severus. I would not ask if there was not a purpose." Minerva raised an eyebrow and stood up from her chair. She walked over to one of the side tables and transfigured it into a full length mirror.

Severus joined her by the mirror. His expression was of slight annoyance and curiosity. With a graceful flick of his right wrist Severus' wand slipped into his hand. Pointing the wand at his person, he whispered "Anima Circumspectus". As he looked up from his chest to his reflection in the mirror what he saw took his breath away and made his body shiver. His mind paused, his chest constricted and his eye grew wide. His aura pulsed a deep emerald-green. It was enthralling. The color was solid and rich. Unable to command his voice he spoke softly, "How can this be?" His mind seemed to have a hard time articulating words for his mouth to say. He was utterly muddled. Severus looked into Minerva's face.

She stood only an arm's length away and made no move to react or comment in any way. Her face gave away nothing. _Best to let him come to the conclusion on his own, _she thought her herself_. _Minerva had dealt with Severus Tobias Snape for 28 years. She had learned a few things about manage the surly young man. She allowed herself a mental smile. Minerva returned the side table to its original state and Severus began to pace.

"Minerva, How can this be?" His voice was low and deep. "My soul has changed. It looks pristine?" His speech pattern sped up marginally as he began to voice his thoughts. "You cannot _repair_ your soul! What happened to me?" Severus was in awe. He could fathom no logical explanation. Then Minerva's words came back to him. _"I believe Miss Grainger cast a_ _very ancient incantation."_ He stopped mid stride and glared at the stone floor in front of him as if it had offended him in some way. With fearful yet furious expectation he looked at Minerva. This type of magic had to require a sacrifice of some kind. This was too great a deed. A feeling of being greatly encroached upon swept over him. Severus enunciated each word with disgust as he asked, "What did she do?". Before he could immerse himself in those feelings Minerva spoke two words that had him leaning heavily on the bookcase to his left.

Minerva spoke firmly but gently, "Vora-Eros." Her eyes pinched. She wanted to tear up at the confession. "The scientific name is Votum Eros Contego Praesto presto, in short Vora-Eros. Have you heard of it before?"

Severus was a million miles away. He focused on his breathing for a moment. _In thru the nose out thru the mouth. In thru the nose out_ _thru the mouth. You need clarity Sev_. Yes, he had heard of the Vora-Eros incantation in his theology studies while working towards his Potions Mastery. The incantation was more a theory than a proven spell. The few excerpts known to the wizarding world at large were broad in summation and minimal in instruction. Severus recalled the readings of his earlier years. The Vora-Eros allows a family member who wishes to save a dying loved one to beseech Eros, the God of love, to prevent their loved ones death. The caster must be willing to die in love and charity for the other person. It is believed that the sacrificial act would appease death with the soul of the caster and allow the loved one to survive. Some translations specifically stated only family members as in blood or husbands and wives could successfully cast the spell. It is believed that the spell works by pinpointing the moment just before death, awaits for the soul to fracture as it begins to embark on its journey from the body of the dying loved one and absorbs the soul of the caster; binding the escaping soul back to the body of their loved one. The insertion of an external soul restores health to the recipient. Unlike a Horcrux the breaking of the soul and installing it into another does not create a life bond but may kill the caster.

Authors Note:

Anima (Latin) Def. Soul or spirit

Circumspectus (Latin) Def. Visual examination, contemplation

Votum (Latin) Def. Promise to God, prayer, wish or desire

Contego (Latin) Def. To protect

Praesto presto (Latin) Def. To be responsible for


	5. Wherefore art thou

AN: So sorry it has been so long. Work, life, kids, you name the excuse I have it. I was finally able to steal away and complete another chapter. I also revised a bit of Ch 4 and touched up the other chapters a bit.

Chapter 5 Wherefore art thou

"Poppy, do you remember the night, just before Hogwarts closed, at the end of my sixth year; I told you I was worried for Professor Snape and you told me that I needn't worry about him and the he could take care of himself and likes it that way." The memory made a small smile break across her face. It quickly faded.

"I was concerned for Professor Snape because it was I who sent him to his death. I had signed his death certificate when I told Professor Dumbledore my suspensions of the necessary sequence of events to succeed at defeating Voldemort." For what seemed like the umpteenth time, Hermione rubbed her palms over and into her eyes. " I stood by as he disarmed and killed Albus Dumbledore knowing it would result in his own death by Voldemort. The irony is endless! Professor Snape proved his loyalty to Voldemort by killing Dumbledore only to be murdered by Voldemort for the very same act." She sighed heavily then continued her story.

"I felt a deep empathy for Professor Snape. I knew that he had begrudgingly agreed to be Professor Dumbledore's executioner. I secretly hoped that he would refuse. I could not help but to think how terrifying it must have been for Professor Snape to kill the only person that knew his true motivations. While I traveled with Harry in search of Horcruxes I had plenty of time to think over what I learned from the possibility theories, reflect on the many things Dumbledore had told me and reanalyze that which I had observed of Professor Snape first hand." Hermione's eyes blazed with passion. "Then I saw those memories Poppy." She stated with reverence. "His love, his despair and his desolation. It was inhumane." The last statement came out in a whisper. Hermione straightened and a look of resolution stiffened her posture and facial features.

Madam Pomfrey was a little taken aback by the intensity in Hermione's eyes. Her blazing heart demanded to see an injustice brought to amendment. Poppy smiled inwardly. _Mmm hmm, there it is. _She thought to herself and sat quietly, attentively listening to Hermione's story.

"He was a young man left to his own devices and Professor Dumbledore took full use of his moment of need. I am not saying I disagree with Professor Dumbledore's actions entirely but he could have done things differently. While Professor Snape made decisions of his own accord, Professor Dumbledore allowed him to fester and suffer as a means of ensuring his spy. Professor Snape's bleak and damaged soul weighted his mind. His guilt became his atonement method. His pain and remorse filled him so completely that it sculpted his very thought process. To feel guilt was his punishment and it was rightfully so in his mind. His crime against Lily had brought the man to his knees and ended him where he stood. His body may have continued on but his heart died right there at Dumbledore's feet when he was unable to protect Lily Potter from the very prophecy he himself had offered to the Dark Lord." Hermione was near tears but she was resolved to speak her truth. A few deep breaths righted her breathing and helped clear her mind.

"A single moment eighteen years ago should not define a person. A brilliant mind should not be arrested and confined to a single task." Hermione paused and breathed in thru her nose deeply. "To have given all and be awarded only the embrace of death was too much for me to comprehend. " Hermione stood with the resolution of a woman with a conviction that would not be moved. "With all he has sacrificed, including his own soul, he has atoned. He was due redemption."

Attempting to lighten the buzz of energy in the office air Poppy quipped, "Well, it seems redemption has found him." They had moved to the more private and comfortable accommodations of Madam Pomfrey's office and the air was now heavy with Hermione's residual magic. "As I said earlier, if there is anyone who deserves your sacrifice, it is he. I agree Severus received the raw end of every situation." Poppy shared a warm worn smile that tucked her cheeks around her eyes and reminded Hermione of her ever-smiling Grandmother. Hermione's heart panged with a quick thought of her parents.

"I am an old optimist Hermione. You look at the rational; I will keep my eye on the hopeful. Tell me what you learned about the Vora Eros spell." Truth be told the curiosity was killing her. Not to mention Severus felt different in her presence. She could not quite describe it.

Hermione deflated a little at the new direction of the conversation. The moment for acknowledgement of what she had done in full had come. She moved from beside the fireplace where she had been standing resolutely a moment before. "Would you care to continue this discussion in the atrium Poppy?" Hermione's thoughts were humming, organizing the facts of what she would say. She found herself preferring a more open space at the moment. The small office seemed a bit suffocating. Hermione felt the need to breath fresh air and walk around. The medical wing atrium would do nicely.

Poppy smiled and stood. "It is lovely this time of year." She followed Hermione out of the office and away from the over energized confines of her office.

Hermione walked reverently around the hip high stonewall creating a raised flowerbed with brilliant spear thistles growing in a rock garden. "The tomb I found in the Lestrange vault was an ancient text. It was written in Latin with ancient ruin directions for most of the spells. I am lucky I had my copy of Ancient Ruin Translation textbook with me from sixth year studies. The author and title of the text are unknown to me. The cover is rawhide with no inscription. When I read the authors preface of the spell, it stated a family member of either blood or bond could only speak the incantation. However in the instructions of the incantation, written in ancient ruin, it instructs the caster to firmly and clearly depict in ones mind their fealty in an imagery sequence…"

For a moment Hermione was not where she stood. As she recanted the particulars of casting the spell she recalled the feeling of an immense heat. Never had she experienced the level of magical power that coursed thru her body as when she cast the Vora-Eros. In reflection it was enthralling and terrifying at the same time. The magnanimous power surge was intoxicating. The remembrance of offering her life as a sacrifice was terrifying. With a shudder that began at her head and rolled down to the soles of her feet Hermione came back to awareness and ceased her laps around the flowerbed to sit at a stone bench near by.

"The instructions did not call for any form of proof or manifestation of the casters family connection. By the omission of the requirement to provide proof of heritage, I was led to believe the true ideal was only blood or bonded of another would sacrifice their life for another. In reality as long as the intent is sacrificial and completely selfless the spell could be cast by anyone." Hermione was smiling softly as she finished her explanation. She was rather proud of herself for being correct on this point. After all, she couldn't exactly test the theory beforehand.

Hermione continued on, "When I cast the spell Professor Snape was literally a breath away from death. This was necessary for the spell to work. Professor Snape needed to be at the cusp of death, when the soul starts to leave the body. At this moment the body and soul separate and the weakest and most damaged part of his soul was dislodged first. When the most damaged part of his soul separated from his body the spell severed the damaged part of his soul, allowing it to pass on to death. At this same moment a part of my soul was inserted into Professor Snape, binding his remaining soul back to his body and healing his fatal wounds.

Poppy devoured her every word. Oh no, Hermione may not have been in conventional love or kin to Severus but she cared just as deeply. Hermione had already filled her heart and mind with adoration and respect to the inth degree. She cared enough about the severity of injustice inflicted upon him to make it her ultimate crusade to see him redeemed. _The girl has the heart of a child with the mind and power of a grown women. Blind and rightfully so. _Poppy mentally chuckled to herself.

Hermione exhaled heavily and stared down at the dirt nestled in the crevices of the decorative path that winds thru the atrium. "There were several missives folded and inserted between the pages of how to prepare and execute the spell. One note was a list of what I believe to be a second hand account of what a recipient of the Vora Eros experiences. The effects consisted of complete to partial memory loss, loss of cognitive abilities, loss of fears and an indifference to traumatizing past events." Mindlessly Hermione picks up a scuffed stone from the ground and turns it over in her hands. She had not looked Poppy in the eye since she began this second part of the explanation. She was too afraid of what she might see. Poppy said she was ok with what Hermione had done but Poppy didn't know just how invasive her actions truly were until now.

"From what you have already told me of Professor Snape's actions after waking; he has retained his memories, previous personality, and the ability to function normally so complete memory loss and loss of the mental faculties can be ruled out. Hermione was wringing her hands and nervously wiping her palms on her jeans now. She was beyond nervous. She was flat out scared. She had half expected to die in her efforts but deep down knew that she would not. Something instilled in her the equivocal notion that she would survive and Professor Snape would be ok. It was an irrational and unfounded notion but it consumed her as if it were irrefutable fact. She could not explain it. She just knew. She also knew that her intent while casting the spell would have most likely triggered the latter of the aforementioned effects.

Taking a deep breath Hermione turned to Poppy, who had sat down next to her on the bench. "I am pretty sure Professor Snape will be indifferent to past events. To be frank, I cast the spell with that very intent." She was starting to feel fatigued. Rubbing her eyes with the palm of her hands she tried to squash the tiredness building behind them.

Poppy gasped at the implications of Hermione's words. Severus may now be apathetic toward the events of his life that had defined him. His actions regarding Lily Potter all those years ago lead to his lifetime of self inflicted privation**. **Poppy had been the Matron at Hogwarts for more years that she cared to count and with her position came absolute trust. She did not take the responsibility lightly. She kept more secrets of the on goings at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry than all the Professors combined. Except for the Headmaster, of course. He has the unfair advantage of the castle itself to provide insight. She had watched Severus as a boy be bullied by the Marauders. She observed as he fell in love with Lily Potter. She witnessed his dark nature and feverish thirsts for all knowledge develop as he grew into a young man. She saw the transition from coping, brooding, and overly sarcastic young man to the snarling Professor he is today. Most importantly she saw the abuse that was inflicted on his person as he fulfilled his role as Dumbledore's spy. Severus willingly subjects himself to unspeakable things all in the name of guilt. He had suffered for years and now he could be without the oppressive weight of self-loathing. He may very well not feel remorse for his part in the death of Lily Pottery. Poppy could scarcely imagine such a thing. Poppy thought to herself, _Of all the blessings, this was truly the most unimaginable. _She now understood Hermione's earlier trepidations were likely well founded. Not even she could say just how Severus was going to take this revelation. "Are you positive Hermione?" Poppy asked in a rushed whisper.

Hermione bobbed her head in reply and exhaled a breath she had not realized she was holding. Poppy was not angry with her but now the Matron understood why Hermione feared the inevitable visit from Professor Snape.

Severus' gait was long and swift. He moved with the agility of a snake stalking towards an unsuspecting prey. He had lost his temper in Minerva's presence. He had shattered all the cups in the tea alcove. The haphazard collection had always secretly annoyed him. It was too disorderly too eclectic for his careful eye. Severus smiled to himself as he recalled the look on Minerva's face. Shock mixed with a moment of indignation and a fleeting sliver of fear. He had felt the surge of his power as his mind wrapped itself around the facts he knew of the Vora Eros. Instead of letting the excess power effervesce and thrum to the point of being perceptible he opted to shatter each of the obnoxiously individual drinking vessels in a display of control and art. He had enjoyed his moment of temper. Now he was about to put a little Slytherin in his cauldron of un-quailed anger.

Gone were his days of being a subordinate and biting his tongue. He had lived a life with two to many masters... and died! He was no longer a man who would accept being a servant to anyone. Miss Granger had gone too far. He was furious. His anger seemed to pull at him from all directions. He was angry at himself for allowing a child to save his sorry arse. He was mutinous that he did not know how she did it and he was near panic-stricken at the thought of what she had done to her own soul. What weighed on his mind even more is the side effects of such magic. _Yet another person he would be indebted to._ He growled at the thought. He had not expected to live thru the final battle but now that he had the opportunity to reflect on his survival, he had rather hoped to be free of life debts and unbreakable vows. Not that he knew to what extent he and Miss Granger were now associated. Minerva knew less than himself about the intricacies of the Vora Eros. After giving Miss Grainger a proper dressing down he intended to cast a few diagnostic spells that would provide some idea of any physical or spiritual connections.

As he rounded the corner leading to the Medical Wing Severus slowed his pace to gather his thoughts. Preparing himself to be the imposing and intimidating Potions Master he pulled down his cuffs, swished his bat like cloak, squared his shoulders and shoved the doors to the ward open and marched in. His theatrics were wasted.

There was no one in the medical ward.

Standing roughly a quarter way into the room Severus stopped and huffed in annoyance. "Where could the two hens have gotten off to?" he inaudibly mumbled to himself.

Oh, he should have known Poppy would spirit Hermione away to a place they could be alone. _Poppy's office, _he mentally grumbled. His quiet and graceful steps found new purpose as he strode towards the heavy mahogany door to the right of the medical wing. As he reached the door, he could hear that it was silent behind the door. _Perhaps a silencing charm, no matter_, he thought to himself as he pushed the door open. There were not wards active. He just walked right in.

Hermione had been in this room. Severus' eyes may have been viewing an empty, slightly warm, and slightly stuffy room but his senses had taken a sonar picture of the rooms magical energy and shown Severus by way of expanding all magical signatures that the Gryffindor know-it-all was indeed in this room recently. Severus had not survived being a spy for 19 year without learning a few reconnaissance style charms. Her residual magic was heavy in the air. Wisps, like layers of smoke weighted the air near the fireplace and of course Poppy's signature was everywhere like a second skin over the room.

_They were here but where did they go?_


End file.
